We all have issues with “change.” The thought of making a significant life change can be so intimidating for some of us that even though we want to step up and “take charge” of our own destiny, we end up doing nothing. Or we settle for less than we deserve simply because we’re so afraid of that change. This week I’ll give you three reasons you can end up paralyzed by fear and what you can do about them. Next week I’ll give you three more to make an even half-dozen. Here we go:
#1. The Big Kahuna–Fear of the Unknown
Someone has said, “The Devil you know is better than the one you don’t.” Your current situation, even if it is toxic and unfulfilling is at least predictable. “What if I decide to make a change and it ends up worse than what I have now? What if I take a chance and end up failing? What if…?” If you let it, your imagination can very easily and effectively dream up a never ending supply of terrible things that could happen. The good news is that your mind can also work in the opposite direction! You have the potential to use your energy to imagine the absolute best thing that could happen. It’s simply a matter of focus.
There have been periods in my life when I wasted so much time imagining the worst case scenario when there was very little chance that it would happen and a much greater probability of something wonderful manifesting instead. Because you can’t accurately predict the future (BTW, if you can, please email back so we can talk about the stock market!) there’s no way you can’t tell for sure what the exact consequences of your actions will be. It’s much more of a “quantum” probability type of thing than a Newtonian “cause and effect” type of thing. Try approaching a new situation with this mindset: “I can’t lose– regardless of the outcome of the decision I make–because the world is a place of opportunity and I look forward to the learning and growing that any outcome gives me.”
#2. Self-Doubt
You may not notice it anymore when you’re driving, but there’s a warning label on your passenger side rear view window that reminds you that what you’re looking at is not in correct scale. Your eyes are playing with your sense of proportion and it can be dangerous if you try to change lanes without making the mental adjustment. Likewise, when you’re contemplating making a life change, it can seem a lot bigger and harder than it really is. Yes, there may be a certain level of physical challenge involved, but the majority of the problem is inside your head. The question of “Who do you think you are thinking you can do that?” reveals the present of self-doubt.
Marianne Williamson writes: “We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of god. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are born to make manifest the glory of god that is within us. It is not just in some of us. It is in everyone. And as we let our light shine, we give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
3. Hide and Brood
Sometimes when one is going through challenging times, there is a tendency to feel isolated and think that you are the only person in the world suffering in this way. At times like this, if you’re like me, you feel a great need for external reassurance that you’re doing the right thing. There have been times when I’ve spent days and days asking everyone for their opinion, even posting questions to complete strangers on Facebook and Twitter so that I don’t have to take responsibility for making the decision. From my own personal experience, trust me when I tell you that the hardest part of making a huge decision is during the time spent agonizing over it. Every extra minute spent worrying and wondering if you got it perfectly summed up will come back to bite you! There’s nothing to be gained from sitting on the fence, trying to play out every possible permutation of what might happen, while you drive everyone around you crazy. Weigh the options. Give it due diligence. Decide, and then take massive action to overcome the inertia of moving in the new direction. The good news is that when you finally take the step that makes your decision official, public, and non-revocable, you will immediately feel lighter and freer. There is often an excited energy and a feeling of liberation that fuels your movement forward. Again, it’s the hemming and hawing part that stops you in your tracks.
O.K., that’s the first three. Next week I’ll give you three more. In the meanwhile, remember that if you want to achieve great things or even just achieve inner peace, it will require stepping out of your comfort zone and trying something new. A great first step is would be to contact me for a 45 minute FREE life transformation strategy session.
In this session we will:
Click here to schedule your complimentary session!
My new Facebook site is now up! Please visit. I’d appreciate your “Like!” and if you sign up for my e-list from Facebook, I’ll send you my latest time management suggestions.
Want to use this article on your website or your own Ezine?
Thanks for appreciating the value of this content. You’re welcome to reproduce this article, but you must reproduce it in its entirety and leave all the links active. Additionally, here is the short bio that you should include:
Dr. Steve Stutz, CC is a Life Success Coach, specializing in helping clergy and professional church workers not only survive but to thrive during periods of crisis, transition, and renewal. To receive periodic personal development tips and success mindset articles, please join his e-list by visiting www.forwardpathcoaching.com
Someone has said, “The Devil you know is better than the one you don’t.” Your current situation, even if it is toxic and unfulfilling is at least predictable. “What if I decide to make a change and it ends up worse than what I have now? What if I take a chance and end up failing? What if…?” If you let it, your imagination can very easily and effectively dream up a never ending supply of terrible things that could happen. The good news is that your mind can also work in the opposite direction! You have the potential to use your energy to imagine the absolute best thing that could happen. It’s simply a matter of focus.
There have been periods in my life when I wasted so much time imagining the worst case scenario when there was very little chance that it would happen and a much greater probability of something wonderful manifesting instead. Because you can’t accurately predict the future (BTW, if you can, please email back so we can talk about the stock market!) there’s no way you can’t tell for sure what the exact consequences of your actions will be. It’s much more of a “quantum” probability type of thing than a Newtonian “cause and effect” type of thing. Try approaching a new situation with this mindset: “I can’t lose– regardless of the outcome of the decision I make–because the world is a place of opportunity and I look forward to the learning and growing that any outcome gives me.”
#2. Self-Doubt
You may not notice it anymore when you’re driving, but there’s a warning label on your passenger side rear view window that reminds you that what you’re looking at is not in correct scale. Your eyes are playing with your sense of proportion and it can be dangerous if you try to change lanes without making the mental adjustment. Likewise, when you’re contemplating making a life change, it can seem a lot bigger and harder than it really is. Yes, there may be a certain level of physical challenge involved, but the majority of the problem is inside your head. The question of “Who do you think you are thinking you can do that?” reveals the present of self-doubt.
Marianne Williamson writes: “We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of god. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are born to make manifest the glory of god that is within us. It is not just in some of us. It is in everyone. And as we let our light shine, we give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
3. Hide and Brood
Sometimes when one is going through challenging times, there is a tendency to feel isolated and think that you are the only person in the world suffering in this way. At times like this, if you’re like me, you feel a great need for external reassurance that you’re doing the right thing. There have been times when I’ve spent days and days asking everyone for their opinion, even posting questions to complete strangers on Facebook and Twitter so that I don’t have to take responsibility for making the decision. From my own personal experience, trust me when I tell you that the hardest part of making a huge decision is during the time spent agonizing over it. Every extra minute spent worrying and wondering if you got it perfectly summed up will come back to bite you! There’s nothing to be gained from sitting on the fence, trying to play out every possible permutation of what might happen, while you drive everyone around you crazy. Weigh the options. Give it due diligence. Decide, and then take massive action to overcome the inertia of moving in the new direction. The good news is that when you finally take the step that makes your decision official, public, and non-revocable, you will immediately feel lighter and freer. There is often an excited energy and a feeling of liberation that fuels your movement forward. Again, it’s the hemming and hawing part that stops you in your tracks.
O.K., that’s the first three. Next week I’ll give you three more. In the meanwhile, remember that if you want to achieve great things or even just achieve inner peace, it will require stepping out of your comfort zone and trying something new. A great first step is would be to contact me for a 45 minute FREE life transformation strategy session.
In this session we will:
- Uncover hidden challenges that may be the cause of chaos, stress and discord in your life.
- Create a crystal clear vision for your “ultimate life” of tremendous success on your terms with ample quality time and energy for all your priorities.
- Leave the session renewed, re-energized, and inspired to transform your life and accomplish all of the things that are really important to you.
Click here to schedule your complimentary session!
My new Facebook site is now up! Please visit. I’d appreciate your “Like!” and if you sign up for my e-list from Facebook, I’ll send you my latest time management suggestions.
Want to use this article on your website or your own Ezine?
Thanks for appreciating the value of this content. You’re welcome to reproduce this article, but you must reproduce it in its entirety and leave all the links active. Additionally, here is the short bio that you should include:
Dr. Steve Stutz, CC is a Life Success Coach, specializing in helping clergy and professional church workers not only survive but to thrive during periods of crisis, transition, and renewal. To receive periodic personal development tips and success mindset articles, please join his e-list by visiting www.forwardpathcoaching.com
Copyright: archidea / 123RF Stock Photo
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